Hello and welcome to my blog.

Firstly, thank you for taking the time to read this I do appreciate it and secondly everything you read is 100% true based stories and please don’t feel sorry for me and my events. I have decided to try and have a new approach on life and to not take things so seriously however for anyone who personally knows me can agree that I have an abundance amount of bad luck. Instead of feeling sorry for myself (which I do from time to time) and thinking the universe hates me (which it does) I am trying to see the funny side of things and I have figured this out by the reactions of other people when I tell them my life stories and daily occurrences. Their reactions tend to be laughing and a shocked ‘are you serious? no ways that happened! shame man…’. So after making a few people laugh and smile I have decided to try and make more people do the same by writing publically for all to see.

So that’s that, now a little about me. Well, I’m a major bitch first of all let’s just get that out-of-the-way and by the way its one of my best attributes (I believe in turning a negative into a positive when beneficial to oneself). I am a 23-year-old South African (hence my style of writing is a cross between South African and British slag, so if you don’t understand – just google it Janice, ok?) uhm where was I … yeh so I’m from SA and I live in South West London (SOUTH of the river, we don’t like those who come from the north and we don’t go north of the river, it’s just a weird thing Brits do and I just follow along incase they throw me out). So yeh I live in this lovely grey and cold city which I love actually, my best days are when it rains and occasionally it snows like three times a year and I get very very excited and send everyone pictures of the weather forecast and the snow on cars (because it doesn’t settle, I’m not that lucky – hence the fucking title of this blog, duh).

I have lived in South Africa my whole life and went to school there and university which I did not complete, I did however pass but let’s not get into that. After a year of uni I decided to have a ‘gaaap yaaaarhhh’ (gap year) and went to Thailand to teach English for the year of 2015 and got my qualification to teach English as a second language. Then my best friend who lives in London decided to convince me to move to London and I was just like ‘yeh fuck it why not?’ So I got back to SA and within a month and a bit I was on a one-way flight to Landan town. worst decision of my life. hahaha I’m joking I fucking love London and the way people never smile or help you when your shopping bag breaks in the middle of the street , ah man its great here. No shame on a serious note I have been here for three years now and do not have any plans to move anywhere else anytime soon, looks like England will be home forever (yes I do have my citizenship and no I did not marry to get it, it’s from my dad’s side ok). I’ve had my ups and downs while living here and my fair share of jobs but I am currently working as a nanny for two boys in Clapham and I chill with their beautiful white husky all day – she’s the only one who can bear to spend that much time for me.

All my family is back in SA expect for my wonderful God-mother who lives up by the lakeside district. I speak to my mom everyday- she is my best friend and I do miss her dearly but we know we will be reunited again when she comes to live in Barrow-in-Furness with my God-mother.

so yeh I think that’s pretty much about it for now. I do hope you enjoy reading my stories and please feel free to comment with ones of your own. I do seriously suck at telling stories in person and hence why I feel this blog is the perfect platform, so the next time I’m out with my friends and they go ‘Jods tell that story about x, y and z’ and I’ll just whip out a business card with my blog name on it and just say ‘read the blog’ put my sunglasses on and walk away.

Then come back after I’ve had my smoke and hopefully they have changed the subject. See I’ve got this thing all worked out.

Enjoy y’all!